Today we made you a video about how you can “Book the Book” tour. It’s in German because I’ll be starting my book tour in all German-speaking countries. Keep scrolling for some photos & a random video!
Now that you’ve seen it, join in the BOOK MY BOOK tour and book me via:
rittisoncco@gmail.com
facebook.com/rittisoncco
twitter @ritti soncco
So how all this happened was, yesterday I was rambling to my good friend, Jamie the Pict, about making a video for y’all. He immediately offered to film it for me because he’s a Very Kind Man who loves doing Weird Things. Hence I say good friend!
on our way!
He knows Aberdeen like his own “westentasche” (haha inside joke) so when I said I wanted to be in a tree, he suggested filming at Hazelhead Park. Like most things in Scotland, Hazelhead Park is partly a golf course, but this summer, it’llhost the Highland Games for Aberdeenshire, wherein ole Scottish things are done, such as throwing cabers and looking like badly-hidden euphemisms which would prove Freud right.
Anyway, we drove around the park until I screamed: “THERE’S OUR TREE!”
We tried different angles, Jamie fought with my iPod’s focus, and we grr’d when golf cars or horse trunks rumbled by… But we got our shot!
And here are some photos of how we fell in love with this beautiful tree.
Jamie’s filming position
film pose
And some video nonsense.
There, dear ayllu, now you know how to BOOK MY BOOK. Remember I’m open to all your suggestions. I’ll read by your favourite river. If you play a musical instrument, maybe we can do a literary-musical fusion? I’ll read at midnight, at noon. Make it exciting, let your imagination go wild. I’m up for all sorts of epic nonsense.
So BOOK MY BOOK and tell all yer friends Qayqa is coming!
Thank you so much. Have an orchid.
Phalaenopsis Orchid
(This comes from a link a good friend sent me of plants looking like creatures. You’ll love it, so click here, then BOOK MY BOOKtour!)
It’s a cloudy, moody day in Ulm; the kind that brings out the green in trees. I’m sitting in an empty house near the park, near the city center. My host family is out and about, living their lives and going to school, and I am loving the quiet nothingness.
my host family
My host children are circus students of mine, and back in June 2013 the family showed me their guest room and said, “When you come back to Ulm in 6 months, you can stay here, for as long as you like.”
6 months later, the children wrote me: “Are you coming? Are you staying with us?”
Who am I to say no! It has been such an uncomplicated, relaxed and fun stay that I am already sad to leave at the end of the week. An example of how lovely it’s been is a quote I tweeted last night:
Just told my host it’s coincidence that every time they’re about to eat, I walk in. He said: I think it’s evidence of pre-established harmony.
cuddle puddle
I’ve been uploading pictures like mad onto Facebook and, looking over the album two nights ago, I realised I could boil my life in Germany down to two things: friends and the circus.
my host girl
Or even a fusion: circusfriends.
family portrait
The evening I arrived in Ulm, I went straight to the Ulmer Messe for the Kunstschimmern art event, where Mark was showing our films and performing afterwards. It was a great way to see many artist friends at once, but it was also very emotional and I felt on the verge of tears for most of the night.
There I was, the beraggled university student – and people still remembered me as the writer. I was having a lovely conversation with a young lady when a man joined us and she turned and introduced me for me: “This is Ritti, she wrote that book.” I didn’t know she knew who I was! Everyone still remembered my crowdfunding project; everyone still asked me about Qayqa. And there I was, the beraggled university student.
So to answer all your questions ABOUT QAYQA.
The Easter holidays are just too short a time to do much with Qayqa in terms of publishing and touring. Lucky for me, Scottish university closes earlier than schools in Germany, leaving me with the whole month of July to perform in Germany. That, at the moment, is the plan. I’ll return to Germany in July, publish and perform Qayqa, and everyone will get their book.
I know it’s taken a lot longer than people wanted, and I myself am quite torn about this. On the one hand, a lot changed in my life: I went from being an artist to a university student! On the other hand, I would have loved to have closed the Qayqa chapter before opening the university one.
But it wasn’t possible. The illustrations weren’t done, and I still had some editing to do on Qayqa. I apologise to the people who have been waiting, but I really am not about to rush the publication of my first novel. I hope they can understand that.
And perhaps it’s good that I couldn’t close the chapter, because this way, Qayqa is alive during my university experience, and I haven’t quite shaken loose of my artist identity. So while it’s a bit crazy to have two identities at once… Perhaps it’s what I’ve been doing my whole life, and I really should be used to it by now.
Robotermark performing at Kunstschimmern
Working with Mark has not always been easy. I’ve been keeping relatively quiet about it on my blog, but last night I thought there are some things that can be said.
Mark is my best friend, and – in my opinion – one of the greatest artists of our time. His potential is limitless. The Kunstschimmern was an epic example of this. He can seamlessly slip from the role of film maker to comedy-singer who improvises all his lyrics, makes them rhyme, and inspires other musicians to be swept away by his current…
Mark Klawikowski with his makeshift band concept “Songlotterie”
… to creator of giant robot suits …
… to painter, to illustrator
… to my best friend.
Mark & I
Mark creates art I didn’t understand, and through our many conversations over the years, he explained his thoughts, passions, motivations and I came to understand and love an art form I had never cared much for before. We supported and motivated one another, and in our three years together, we made 5 films, won awards, toured Peru, gave workshops in the Netherlands and Germany, gave exhibitions and wrote books.
We were together while I was writing Qayqa and it was clear, from those early days, that he would do the illustrations. Our separation didn’t change that desire – not for either of us – but our separation did block us. For people who don’t understand why the illustration process has taken so long: artists are also people.
That’s not to say I was always understanding and patient. That’s not to say we didn’t occasionally rip each others’ hair out. But we worked – in all senses of the word.
The year I met Mark, the Ulmer Museum had an exhibition whose posters rocked my circle of friends. Everyone I knew was tearing the posters off the walls and hanging them in their rooms. All I can find on the internet is this:
Niki & Jean
The exhibiton was called L’art et l’amour, art and love.
Shortly after the exhibition closed, Mark and I drove to Tuscany to visit Niki de Saint-Phalle’s magnificent Tarot Garden. If you’ve never been there, I cannot recommend it enough.
Us
There was a pillar that, over the years, I have never managed to shake out of my head. I just found it in an album; it’s called “Love Letters”.
It is a dedication from Niki de Saint-Phalle to her artist partner and long-time partner Jean Tinguely.
Somewhere amongst the Love Letters is a small panel that struck me the most, and I didn’t take a photograph of it, perhaps because I didn’t want to think about it at the time. It is a drawing of both Niki and Jean, and the words above them: CAN WE STILL BE FRIENDS? And between them the word: YES.
I knew returning to Ulm would be emotional. This wasn’t something I was going to blog about, but now I understand it’s just an important testimony to artist cooperation, as everything else I have blogged about in the past. To artists who separate and continue working together, all I can say from my experience is: It can work, but it will be work.
Mark and I will always be artist partners because it enriches our lives. With every reason I have to strangle him, he just hugs me back.
And when people hear my frustration about how long the illustrations are taking, about how many deadlines we have missed, they (quite rightly) ask me: “Why do you want him to do the illustrations?? Why don’t you just ask someone else?”
Well we met the other day and Mark showed me the illustrations. All but one are complete. I looked them over and although he had no idea what I was talking about, I blurted: “- Because youget it.”
Every single illustration he showed me shone with love, beauty and understanding for Qayqa. Every single one caused a minor tremble within me that made me, the author, fall in love with Qayqa again. He understood details I had forgotten all about. He understood moods I hadn’t created on purpose. I look at his illustrations and it inspires me for Munay.
I don’t know if anyone else, looking at the illustrations in the finished book, will feel the minor tremble. I am curious if you do. But through the illustrations I felt a deep connection to my artist partner and best friend – one that has survived all these years – and that’s a damn good connection.
We’re working on the cover for Qayqa now. I had this idea.
Sketched, it looked like this.
Mark didn’t like it. So we threw ideas back and forth some more, and then I had this idea.
I drew it down; Mark laughed at my stick figures and terrible trees. We liked it.
And this, dear ayllu, has been my love letter from Ulm.
1st Lap in white, 2nd Lap in light pink, 3rd Lap in magenta
Firstly, I was in Toulouse for the European Juggling Convention. Then I drove with a friend from Toulouse (over La Rochelle) to Brighton, to attend the Aerial Dance Festival there. I spent a few quiet days and not-so-quiet-nights in London with my best friend, then I flew to Carcassonne and travelled around with botanists I met at the EJC, ending up in Montpellier and catching a flight from there to Frankfurt-Hahn.
Before hitting the road I didn’t know how much I would be able to blog so I thought it best to advise everyone to follow my Tumblr account (rittisoncco.tumblr.com) If you want more pictures from my summer, feel free to check them out there!
Oooo it’s strange to be blogging after such a long pause. I feel a bit awkward. Sorry if my writing is bizarre: I need to get back into the flow!
My summer was truly beautiful, and I did it by planning absolutely nothing. I wanted the wind to take me. Following a beautiful invitation, the wind took me back to the south of France for ocean waves, melons, rivers and lakes and frommage de chevre.
In Brighton we trained to a beautiful song. In Montpellier I jotted down a memory. If you like, listen to the song and then give my anecdote your eyes. It’s work-in-progress – or perhaps it’s as far as it will ever go. It’s an anecdote I wrote to remember, and the home for memories are diaries, short stories, and you.
Two Travelers Find Themselves In a City
Two travelers climbed out of the entanglements of the woods and found themselves among the soft French murmurs of the ocean city Montpellier. His hair fell in masses that mimicked the leaves in autumn and smelt of bonfires over which he had cooked dinners and boiled coffee. Her scalp was covered in sand, le sable, and her hair clumped into what would, with time, become dreadlocks formed by swimming in the Mediterranean Sea and in lakes.
Their eyes still searched, accustomed by now to deciphering transparent jellyfish from choppy green water; deciphering which roads led to less people; which rocks could be climbed over and which would cut her left foot.
In this state, they found themselves abruptly in the center of Montpellier. They were trying to camouflage by wearing clothes of finer material, but their skin smelt of midnight washes, naked under the waning moon, and they knew they were tourists – not to this city, but to all cities. The only intimacy she felt necessary, she had come to find in the space between her face and her hair. They had peed in vineyards, on mountains, in showers. They had swum naked; they had argued in towns where no one knew their names.
Now they sat in a restaurant and ordered food.
the food that came
She crossed her legs beneath the glass table with finesse but she was thinking: I hope this city doesn’t grow much larger for it will come between us.I’m pretending, she knew. The woods they had lived in had demanded they expel everything but their core, and it had taken a while for her head to leave. She didn’t want her core to return to the entanglement of the woods, wrapped and hidden by leaves.
He looked as little as ease as she, but his movements were perfect: how he selected the wine, how he held the glass as he tasted his choice. She began a table conversation, but hesitantly.
As they ate, the conversation turned to judgement: how they were perceived on occasions. Feeling the city between them, she told her story in more direct, more revealing manner. She said things she normally would not have; not so quickly: I know they think I’m beautiful and I’ve been judged as having things made easier for me because of that. His smile grew as she gave him intimacy with her anecdote, and he set the wine glass down to hear her.
And they thought: Let’s get the hell away from this restaurant and back into the van.
Let’s cook on its small gas stove that goes out if we leave the doors open. In the kitchen that sways whenever a car whizzes past. Let’s eat on stone slabs and scratch our skin from the latex of figs. I saw who she was when she learnt how to climb. I saw who he was when he swam in the ocean.
I was seen in the woods. Take me back there, I want to be seen again.
Yes, I loved being away from civilization. I thought of you often and wondered if you were checking my blog, wondering where the hell I was. Traveling was beautiful, but it’s good to be back and blogging
I’ve been thinking about the future of the blog since I first toyed with the idea of going to uni. I came to the following conclusion: This has always been a blog about my writing, and as my writing will continue as long as I breathe, this blog will continue being about my writing.
There’s quite a bit to say, but I should mention that the upcoming Kulturnacht on Saturday, 14th September, will be my “last” performance in Germany this year – since I am moving to Scotland in 9 days…
There was a MISTAKE in the official PROGRAM BROCHURE: I START AT 8pm. I’ll probably be reading until 11 pm / midnight, depending on the audience / feedback. I will do my utmost to limit myself to 20 minutes, but I’m feeling quite liberal about the night. I’m taking the guitar, I’ll experiment a bit with poetry, Qayqa, and stuff, and if you show me that you want a performance to go on for longer: I will.
Friedrich Glorian will not be performing with me, as he has engagements elsewhere. I am, ofcourse, very sad to not be collaborating with him on Saturday (I was especially looking forward to our rehearsals!!! I had the impression that they would be great fun) but when he spoke to me about his other engagement, I understood and support his decision 100%. You have to go where your art takes you.
I’m really just letting the Kulturnacht 2013 surprise me. I have a few ideas, and ofcourse I’m slightly nervous (it’ll get stronger as Saturday approaches), but all in all, I just want to focus on feeling comfortable.
On the road and since I’ve returned, I’ve been thinking a lot about the role of artist – and wondering if I really have what it takes. I took this year 2012 / 2013 to focus on my writing, and I found that I wasn’t necessarily more productive than if I hadn’t taken a year off to write. I usually wrote the most when I had to leave the following morning, because the pressure of departure was on me.
The winter was hard. I asked myself often if I really have what it takes to be an artist, a productive creator. I see other artists around me who have been doing this for years, and I admire their enthusiasm and energy so much. It’s such a rollercoaster ride; how the HELL do other people do it?!
I met up with very good friends of mine: filmmakers. They made this film:
It premiered at the Berlinale and was a great success. Since then, the filmmaking company they founded, Kunststoff, has been thriving. They can live comfortably off their work, and we spent a very interesting evening comparing our lives as freelancers, artists, creators.
And I heard my words coming out of their mouths: “It’s a rollercoaster ride. If it weren’t so damn emotional, it’d be alright, but we’re not machines… Sometimes everything is so overwhelming and there no one who can help you with your problem because you’re doing something new, something no one has ever done before, so there’s no one to tell you how to do things. You have to find the solution yourself. It’s beautiful – but it’s exhausting – but it’s beautiful.”
A few days later in Ulm, I went to the Roxy to see the band Okta Logue in concert. Mark and I had stumbled over them accidentally in Darmstadt, and now they finally made it to Ulm… Back in Darmstadt we saw them give an interview and present their music video, which was…
They were in Ulm to present their new album Tales Of Transit City which was stunning, really really stunning. With the first strum of the guitar, the audience of Ulm closed their eyes and swayed. I went to the bar for another beer and from the distance, I could feel Okta Logue cast their spell over the crowd. I walked back into the cloud and felt bewitched. It was a beautiful, beautiful concert, and if you ever have the opportunity to see them live, please don’t miss it.
Here is another song I quite like:
After a magical concert, I fell into a long and interesting discussion with the guitarist and drummer about the nature of being an artist. They mentioned not being too pleased with the gig because they were tired, etc, and we discussed the automatisms we fall into while we perform.
“I know that during this particular sentence, I usually do this hand gesture, so I do it. Even when I don’t feel it, I do it,” I said.
The guitarist nodded quickly: “I know this is usually my pose, so I take it, but I don’t feel it. I start thinking too much, and that’s when I make mistakes. Then it’s oh no, one mistake, and the insecurities pour in so I make a second mistake. Then it’s 2:0 mistakes against me. It’s an internal battle no one else sees while I am onstage.”
I recounted: “I gave a reading once that I wasn’t pleased with and yet the audience gave me great feedback that night. But I was somehow saddened that I had missed out on a beautiful experience that they had all shared with one another. I was there, yes, but I had missed the feeling the night had for them.” They nodded understandingly.
“That’s howit is,” we agreed. “It’s a damn emotional rollercoaster ride.”
Okta Logue is in the middle of a tour throughout Germany and in October they’ll hit the States for 3 weeks. I told them (and I’ll keep saying it) that I wish them every success because they truly deserve it. Their music is divine. Please visit their page here: http://oktalogue.com/wordpress/ and go to their concerts and buy their vinyls and t-shirts. Talk to them afterwards if you can. It’s rare to find people you can fall immediately have deep, meaningful conversations with; but you can with them.
So my insecurities questioning “am I real artist?” are the echo we all share. I’ve written all my life, and I love performing. But for how long will the doubts echo? Will we ever be sure of ourselves as artists? – or is the point of confidence also the point of arrogance?
I know I need the freedom to travel and to write as I see fit. There are many people with many very good ideas about how I should continue my career, and they would all be right, except that I have other plans… Just as Basti said about being a filmmaker: you hit a problem and no one can solve it for you because no one’s ever been here before. It’s the same with every other choice in the artist life: no one has ever been here before, so I will do things my way. I know I’ll doubt and fight and love, but as long as my words reach you, I think I am doing alright.
Find the way you need to live.
I leave you with an interesting conversation I had yesterday with Manfred Eichhorn, owner of the Eichhorn Buchladen where I’ll be reading at the Kulturnacht. Before I hit the road, I gave him the Qayqa manuscript for critique, and over a cup of jasmine tea, he gave me excellent feedback with direction.
And he said:
“You and your novel are inseparable. When you read it, there’s magic. But what happens when you’re not around to read it? Can your words stand on their own? In order to do so, they still need some work.
I also have doubts about your character: why is he a man? He doesn’t always sound or act like a man. If you are so inseparable from your book, why not make the main character a woman? You, perhaps? That will help your reader dive quicker in the world you are creating. Damian is very feminine, and that’s sometimes a problem because I didn’t always believe him.
Either you change Damian into a woman… Or keep the third-person narrative structure and stop speaking from his perspective.”
I have been asking myself ever since: why do I love that Damian is a man? Given the choices Manfred Eichhorn proposed, I would immediately choose to stay true to the third-person narrative and (sad as I find it) eliminate all first-person recounts. Because I love Damian is a man. I cannot turn him into a woman.
But: why not?
Why not…?
See you at the Kulturnacht… Or on the blog.
last night, experimenting different tunes for my poetry
this weekend, somewhere between Freiburg and Berlin
This was a beautiful weekend. I spent one night in Freiburg, visiting a very good friend’s graduating art exhibition. Then I spent three nights in Berlin, visiting my backpacker friend Erick from Colombia, who is currently in Berlin with his band Milmarias, recording their second studio album. Shortly before leaving Bogotá, they gave this fun concert á la Bicycle Sessions:
Until their second studio album is released, you can follow them around on SoundCloud here.
Erick & Kike giving an interview to a radio station in Bogotá, Colombia, over Skype
When I arrived in Berlin on Saturday night, they were opening for a London-Colombian band called Bitch ‘N Monk. Behaving strangely stalker-y, I bought several copies of their demo, followed them on Twitter and found this beautiful band-trailer:
I don’t really have any other way of putting this: strangely, their music felt like a consolation. I was relieved to know this kind of music was still being made – innovatively. Not re-mixed or re-dreamt from the 60s, but genuine in our days. The lyrics had me closing my eyes, smiling in shame / surprise at being caught: admitting that I had had the very thoughts she was singing of. She revealed me to myself – and that’s not something that happens often. So when it does, the reaction is to behave strangely stalker-ish. Caught in the act of being a fan! Feeling understood by an artist is a wonderful wonderful thing.
Of all the songs they performed that night, one really stuck out to me, which I want to share with you now.
Music.
Literature.
Artists going their way.
Making things happen.
Listening to a gut –
a gut feeling telling them: this might be the right way to do it.
I’m in that kind of a knot: How to go about Qayqa? The crowdfunding is done, and everything now is about The Next Step. Everyone is looking to me to direct – and I’m trying to slow everyone down because I want the next step to be a very careful & thought-out enterprise. I ran into the crowdfunding with one fist in the air and my other hand balancing a lot of other things on a shaky plate. Miraculously, it worked. Now I need my steps to be less fisty, less shaky, and slow.
I’ve been thinking a lot about the cover for Qayqa. Mark has some brilliant ideas for making the cover seem magical. We recently walked around a bookstore pulling books off shelves and comparing their covers. Mark is considering something like this:
“The Neverending Story” by Michael Ende
But I recently saw something I think I may like more: an insinuation.
Mary Shelley’s “Frankenstein”
Qayqa‘s insinuation is quite clearly knots. Yes, there are flying people in it, but – trust me – they are not as present in Qayqa as they are in the sequel Munay. Thinking about knots, I immediately remembered an album I adored when I was growing up: Alanis Morisette’s Supposed Former Infatuation Junkie. In the CD booklet were beautiful images of her long hair, and I poured over these images marveling at the simplicity behind the idea.
Mark will come up with some sketches to show me what’s in his head; and I think I might take some pictures of knots and play around with my ideas.
Now… I have 3 days at home, and I am using them mostly to be in bed. I’m doing what I always dream of when I have little time: I watch films.
On Friday, I’m giving a reading at the Kulturnacht der Universität Konstanz, and on Saturday I’m back in Neu-Ulm reading at the Neu-Ulmer Stadtlesen.
On Sunday, I head back to the JOJO Circus School to complete the one module I missed out on last year, when I was backpacking through Latin America: the juggling module. I’ll be going back as an “external student”, training with the class that began one year after we did. A parallel class will be there at the same time, and I am friends with this group, so it won’t be too alienating I think. It will simply be … interesting … to go back to the Rappenhof after such an intense 10 days with my group. To train without them, will be very strange.
I’ll be there for 1 week, then I head off with a friend to the Toulouse, France, for the European Juggling Convention, which goes on for a little over 7 days. Here, I will have the opportunity to meet & train with amazing circus people and live among circus tents again.After this I will roadtrip with my friend to Brighton, England, to the European Aerial Dance Festival. More lessons in trapeze and silks. It’s going to be an intense 3 weeks.
Then I’ll come back to Ulm.
That’s my circus summer.
You’ll be getting a lot of pictures (probably mostly on my Tumblr).
I’m looking forward to it all – but I’m also a bit nervous. There will be a lot of hopping from one world to the next. At least it will all be the circus world, but it involves so much Packing Up & Leaving Again – and I think I’m almost done with that. I’m finally starting to look forward to settling down again somewhere. Yet: the many hours in the car will give me great time to think; time to stare at changing landscapes and ponder in my journal. I’m looking forward to the latter the most.
I’ll be blogging from the road. I’m still in the midst of planning possible dates for Qayqa‘s publication. I’ve also written quite a bit for Munay since the crowdfunding ended. A dam seemed to burst open in my head, and I could write with such clarity. It was a great feeling. I hope it stays.
I have so much to digest at the moment, but above all: I feel calm again. I’m practising walking slowly and I’m trying to digest things whenever I can. I’m writing again. Can you believe this life: in order to be a writer, you need to put the pen down and do everything but writing?! It’s a luxury when I can write. I intend to use those many hours on the road, doing just that.
You’ll be hearing from me.
If you’re wondering what direction the writing is going in, I’ve made a new thing for you to follow: my Writing Music playlist on Spotify! I just wrote something terribly dark for Munay, which is why there is so much from the World War Z soundtrack. Now that we’re moving in a more magical direction, I added Lindsey Stirling. (Thanks Ben) If YOU have any Writing Music suggestions: HIT ME! Instrumental music is very good for writing…
You know what I love blogging about the most? Extracts from my work: telling you what inspired me, giving you behind-the-scenes peeks at metaphors, explaining what personal anecdote led to a certain image… I like showing you how my mind works.
So I will leave you with an extract from Munay; I wrote this just after the crowdfunding project ended. This was my mood for the following piece:
FROM “MUNAY”:
One day we awoke at dawn; tangled in our bedsheets, our hair tangled together. We opened our eyes and I saw reflected in his the desperation I felt every morning when I awoke: thankfully, you are still here. The panic subdued. We smiled carefully. After so many months together, we were still afraid to be boisterous.
Laying in my bed, soaked still from the flight of the night before, our careful fingers tried to untangle our heads. Stubborn strands had a steadfast grip. I didn’t own scissors. I held the stubborn strands of hair tightly and pulled. They ripped from my head but kept their steadfast grip onto Mat. Parts of me would not be separated from him. He smiled.
Stretching our legs in bed, the sun came out from behind the heavy grey clouds. Its rays fell onto my feet and Mat said: “Let’s go for a walk.”
Updated 2nd September 2013: re-cut video of Ritti’s aerial performance
Today I did a few things I haven’t done in a really long time. I sat in a café for careless hours and wrote until I could write no more. I met up with my best friend and we talked about life. I had dinner with Mark and we didn’t talk about work.
I walked slowly.
I feel like I have been living 5 different lives just this week.
Actually, it was 4.
LIFE NUMBER 1: GIVING A FILM WORKSHOP AT A SCHOOL
My beautiful circus friends Marina and Moni were commissioned to give a circus workshop all week; I was commissioned to give a film workshop which would document the circus workshop. I was basically giving my 8th graders a crash-course in documentary filmmaking.
preparing the technology
Moni giving Juggling 101
We got up every morning at 5 am so that we would be at the school on time. I’m a night owl. Getting up at that hour was pretty exhausting. I was sleeping 3-4 hours every night. By the end of the week, I felt I had the rhythm in my system – and then it was over. I still wake up at 6 am wondering why my alarm didn’t ring…
(l.t.r) Ritti Soncco, Marina Colovos, Monika Kolb – Charlie’s Angels, right down to the hair!
It was a beautiful, beautiful week – though tiring – and I’d love to tell you more, but when you teach at a school, you sign a contract in which you vow not to reveal all their secrets and not to post pictures of their students on your naughty little blog. So I’ll tell you instead that I had a great time working with these two very talented, very smart, very worldly circus artistes, who I am very much in awe of. Moni told me a lot about the aerial scene in Sheffield and Edinburgh, which made me very excited about my move to Great Britain in September…
LIFE NUMBER 2: PERFORMING AT ULM MOVES! DANCE FESTIVAL
From the Thursday 4th – Saturday 6th July, I was commissioned by the Strado Dance Company to perform on my aerial silks during a parcours – a parcours which took the audience to various stations in the city center, where architecture or grounds which we normally take for granted, were now used for performance and thus set in a different light.
For example, the walls of the Deutschhaus parking lot:
Marion Glöggler & Yvonne Graf of the Vertical Dance Company. Photograph by Guido Gerlach
Photograph by Volkmar Könneke (Südwest Presse)
A playground:
choreography by Jeanette Füzesi. Photograph by Guido Gerlach
Graffiti:
Strado Dance Company at the Roxy. Photograph by Guido Gerlach
The founder of the Strado Dance Company & organiser of the Ulm Moves! event, Domenico Strazzeri, approached me about hanging up my silks at the Ehinger Tor bus station. We had a meeting with the responsible people at SWU who had to tell us that it was too dangerous. If anything happened to me, they would be sued. Even if I didn’t sue them – the state would. They couldn’t risk it. They were very sorry, but they had to say no.
Domenico isn’t a man of “no”s.
Domenico is a man who moves mountains.
A weeks of phone calls and texts later, he called to say he had organised a crane and would I hang myself from it. A crane? Cranes carry things way heavier than Ritti, even Ritti in full-propellor-motion. I said YES. Domenico got in touch with Andreas Dukek-Haferkorn of the Kulturfahrschule Ulm, who agreed to give us the courtyard space.
Domenico had moved a mountain.
My new workspace was a crane.
red crane, red silks
Domenico may not know this, but ever since the Fab Fab showed me an epic video of aerialist Seanne Sharpe giving an illegal performance on the Williams Bridge (watch it here) I had wanted to give a silks performance in an industrial atmosphere. High up, with iron around me.
Secret dreams come true.
by FOTOGRAFIE Heike Göltenboth
photograph by Heiko Mozer
I was at about 8 – 10 meters height. I’m scared of heights. Plus, there was wind: a terrifying, unpredictable factor. During rehearsals, I dared climb only halfway. It wasn’t until Saturday that I finally climbed all the way up and touched the carabiner. An incredible feeling. And a ritual among aerialists: you always climb up and touch the carabiner.
photograph by Sabrina Fischäß
photograph by FOTOGRAFIE Heike Göltenboth
photograph by Heiko Mozer
More joy at the office: working with an excellent and brilliantly sweet crane technician. Here’s us:
Denis, his crane, I & my silks
On the last day, Denis had a brilliant idea. I begin & end my performance wrapped and hidden in a cocoon. He suggested my cocoon be near the ground when we begin, and he slowly lifts me up; when my performance is over, he’ll then lower me to the ground again. I was scared – simply because it was something new. But we tried it out and the movement of the crane was so soft, I didn’t even notice we were moving. When the performance began, I secretly peeked out because I wondered why he hadn’t begun lifting me – and I was already 3 meters in the air by then!
And then the Fab Fab showed up. And as usual when the Fab Fab shows up: he shows up with technology. He showed up with a few GoPro cameras, one of which he stuck to the crane so that it could film me from above. There’s a fancy GoPro app which acts as a remote control for the camera. I had installed it onto my iPod at Fab’s command, and so he was able to manipulate the camera on the crane during my performance.
What a man.
Not only that… He already finished editing the video! When I began writing this blog, I received an email from him giving me the link. I think the video is BEAUTIFUL. Can you feel the electricity in the air?
Videos sometimes don’t substitute the actual event, but they do act as perfect reminders of amazing moments in our lives. As for me: I am so grateful that the Fab Fab is in my life.
Ulm Moves! was an amazing event. It was fantastic to meet the other performers, to see how much art & culture is bubbling beneath Ulm’s quiet surface. All we needed was someone to string us together and we exploded for Ulm. The audience was great too. I was told we had a total of approx. 400 visitors following the parcours. The applause I received was juicy and a beautiful acknowledgement of my work. I sat in my little cocoon in the end, listening to the applause, the adrenaline of the last drop surging through my veins, and I screamed.
No one heard it, but I screamed. I bowed my head into my knees and I screamed and screamed with joy. This was one of the happiest moments in my life.
photograph by Guido Gerlach
Thank you, Domenico, for giving me this fantastic opportunity.
SWR Radio interviewed the performers and audience:
A final anecdote: I had a beautiful moment in the air that I want to share with you. On Thursday, my first performance, I was sitting up in the cocoon waiting for the music to begin. I could hear the audience coming into the courtyard and I was very aware (and wary) that I was suspended at 6 or 7 meters in the air, held only by a simple knot tied around my foot. I was keeping myself up there – and I wasn’t sure how I felt about that.
In the midst of my nerves wrecking and my doubts shouting, I sat in the cocoon telling myself that I knew exactly what I was doing & that all would be fine… when the sun came out from the clouds. I was sitting just over the rooftop of the Kulturfahrschule, so when the sun came out, it hit my silks directly. The inside of my cocoon was suddenly flooded with light as the sun shone at me. Privately, I sat there. Alone in my height, swaying in the wind like a leaf. Like a real cocoon.
It was a quiet moment before my performance, and I slipped out of my cocoon with a quiet little ecstasy. When I die – if life really flashes before your eyes – I hope this is one of the moments that flash before me. It was a very powerful moment for me.
LIFE NUMER 3: CROWDFUNDING
So it actually worked. Can you believe it? I am astonished. Grateful. Amazed.
I was saying to a friend: “This isn’t a publishing house saying Okay, Ritti, we’ll publish your book. This is 45 people out there saying: You want to be a writer? Okay, we’ll believe in you. Go out there and be the best writer you can be.”
That’s how I see it.
For a while it didn’t look like it would work. We were stuck under €1000 for the longest time.
I was exhausted. I had just come back from receiving my circus pedagogue diploma. My mother, who I rarely see, was visiting. It was my 29th birthday. All I really wanted was to sleep.
As you can see from this post so far, I live several lives at once. There could have been a better time to start this crowdfunding thing, but time was beginning to run out, and I knew: If I don’t do it now, I’m never going to do it.
I was becoming static and depressed. I couldn’t socialise in real life; I could barely socialise online. I couldn’t socialise in real life; I could barely socialise online. I thought: If my crowdfunding doesn’t work out, it really is my own fault.
I was exhausted.
The challenge about doing something is that you are open to critique, and you will always always always have the feeling that you are not doing enough.
It made me so tired.
I had a Serious Business Meeting in bed with Power Ranger when we were both hungover. With a groggy voice she pointed her finger at me and said: “You can still do it, Ritti. But you need to do something!”
She believed in me.
I sat in the bathtub and wrote everyone I could think of.
Maybe it was because I posted a picture of legs in the bathtub.
“How much spare time do you have as an artist? Here’s a clue: I’m in the bathtub with my iPod, writing people asking them to support my crowdfunding project. It ends in 4 days! Without your support, I cannot publish my first novel! Please support!”
Maybe it was because Sarah pestered everyone she knew – and everyone she didn’t know online. (thank you!)
Maybe it was something else. But overnight, we raised €800!!! We were back in the game! That’s when I thought: I’ll be DAMNED if I lose this money now, now that we’re closer to the finishing line!
I wrote, pestered, tweeted and wrote some more. And in the last 10 days, the money literally poured in. Most pledges came in over the last 5 days. The majority was at € 25 (a copy of Qayqa with your name in the acknowledgements) but there were larger sums pouring in too. I now have 2 dinner dates (they go at € 500); one with a great friend, the other with a complete stranger.
And now, Qayqa will be published. She will be yours.
*shaky knees*
*puts on business voice to hide shaky knees*
Here’s the deal: We raised more money than expected! This raises more opportunities. Mark and I have reserved this week for a lot of business talks, planning and layout testing. We’ll meet tomorrow and discuss everything that needs to be done and set it in a timeframe.
But I do want to say this: THANKS to your generosity, I have more opportunities to make Qayqa the best she can be. This extra amount will make so much more possible. I have a few ideas, but I’m going to run them by Mark tomorrow and we’ll consider all our unexpected, new possibilities, and I’ll announce ASAP when you can expect Qayqa to become a proud member of your bookshelf.
LIFE NUMBER 4: THE WRITER
Today is Sunday the 7th July 2013, and my 3 other lives have ended. Today, I had a calm shower, ate calm breakfast, packed my computer and went to a café with wifi. I had coffee with my best friend. When she left I turned on Spotify, I opened Munay and I began to write.
It’s 00:24 o’clock and I’m feeling quite bedazzled. Let me tell you what’s going on: I’m setting my alarm for 5:20 am, because at 6 am I have to get into a beautifully ricketty bus with two gorgeous circus artistes to drive to a school where we’ve been giving a circus workshop all week. My part in all this isn’t circus-teaching; it’s film-teaching: I am teaching 8th graders to make a documentary about the circus workshop, beginning from the first classes to the full-on performance for the school & parents on Friday afternoon. If you want to read more, it was in the Schwäbische Zeitung today: http://alturl.com/fa698
Apart from that, I am also participating in the first Dance Festival in Ulm: ULM MOVES! I will perform tomorrow (Thursday), Friday and Saturday as part of the “Parcours”, wherein dancers, actors and performers make static buildings come to light. Marion Glöggler, for example, will do a “vertical dance” in which she suspends herself from the walls of the Deutschhaus car park.
Marion Glöggler of the Vertical Dance Compagnie
I am at the Kulturfahrschule (at the Ehinger Tor), performing on my red aerial silks, suspended from a red crane… Here is an image from today’s rehersal:
photograph courtesy of Sabrina Fischäß
If you want to see it, here are the dates:
Thursday, 4th July: approx. 6 pm
Friday, 5th July: approx. 6 pm
Saturday, 6th July: approx. 4 pm
I say approximately because my performance is part of a tour / parcours through the city, so when I perform really depends on when my audience arrives. I’ll be told some 5 minutes beforehand, which should give me enough time to climb the silks and get into position.
But none of this has anything to do with the title of this post! I just wanted to show you what I’m up to, give you a bit of an insight as to why I haven’t been blogging lately: BECAUSE MY HEAD IS in the air… in school… on the StartNext Website!
Which brings me to the POINT.
THE POINT!
It is now 00:43 o’clock.
It just happened. 5 minutes ago we were beneath the goal. Now. RIGHT NOW, I clicked “refresh” and everything suddenly moved slower…
About an hour ago, Pixie called me from the States. All she said when I picked up was: “Congratulations!” We hadn’t reached the goal yet, but we were €50 away.
I couldn’t believe this. I replied: “I feel like I should do something crazy as a thank you for all these amazing people! Like maybe jump out of a window naked.” She laughed and said: “You totally should!”
Dearest most wonderful, most beloved ayllu of my heart. I owe you more than words can express. I owe you more than a ridiculous blog post 4 hours away from getting up again.
You have baffled me, bewildered me, AMAZED me. You supported me, you believed in Qayqa, and now, my dearest people of the world: Qayqa you will get…
I want to take this moment to express my absolute sense of … UTTER PANIC. If you’ve been watching Qayqa on StartNext, you’ll know that we were slowly trickling, and when people asked me if I thought we could make it, I replied honestly: “I really have NO IDEA. It could work. It could not. No clue.”
Then a sudden overnight leap of €800. It put us back in the game! And that was the moment when my panic struck.
Shit. People will actually read Qayqa. To the end. What if it’s rubbish? What if no one likes it? Is it too late to back out now? Maybe I should go back quickly and do some serious last-minute-full-of-panic editing. Delete everything. New ending. Damn damn damn. Why do I always do such silly, ridiculous things? I never learn.
So, no lies: you are actually going to get Qayqa and that makes me feel a terrified – and excited!
I want to post properly about my crowdfunding experience, but the main thing I need to say right now is that I always felt like I wasn’t doing enough (and I probably wasn’t). There were amazing people out there who sent me long emails / messages, suggesting brilliant new tactics to get more supporters. I couldn’t follow up on all the ideas, and I often felt like I really wasn’t doing enough. For example, I never got around to making a Qayqa facebook page. Such sacrilege!
And yet. Crowdfunding: A SUCCESS!!!
I made you a video just now. It’s just me being nonstop grateful in my pajamas:
A few days ago, after the €800 struck overnight and I first realised we could actually make it, I was pulling a heavy suitcase along a train platform and my head began singing a song. This song, my darling ayllu, my beautiful supporters, IS FOR YOU. For everyone who believed; for everyone who supported; for those who wrote saying they couldn’t pledge but believed & wished me luck; for everyone who spread the word (like love), who hit the forums, who believed.
THANK YOU for helping a dream come true. This song – along with all my gratitude – is for you. Y’all made Qayqa feel pretty damn mthrfcukn special.
1:21 o’clock. GOODNIGHT AYLLU.
You people kicked some serious Crowdfunding BUTT. I also decided something: In the last pages of the book Qayqa, I will publish an excerpt from her sequel Munay, in English, so that you get a feeling for what is coming next…! Like?
Last Thursday, I had the honour of hosting a fantastic audience at my 2nd Crowdfunding Party. Unfortunately I don’t have any pictures of my audience, although I had been meaning to get some. At the time, it just seemed more important to enjoy their company as much as possible. And 3 days later, they’re still the topic I want to dedicate this post to.
I don’t know what it was. I definitely felt more prepared than at the 1st Crowdfunding Party, but I didn’t have an opening speech prepared, which, when I stood behind the curtain about to go onstage, was a bit of a worry. I was slightly nervous because I had a few family members in the audience, and the fact that I read barefoot and it was cold, made my voice shake.
And yet, the second I stepped onto the stage, I felt something I didn’t feel the last time: This stage is my home.
I felt so comfortable, so relaxed, that I even began cussing – something I only really do around people I feel very comfortable with. I even had my “normal” body language: in the short speeches between the poems, I didn’t use my “performance” body language, but relaxed into the way I would if I were normally speaking to friends.
And ofcourse there were friends in the crowd – but that’s of little “consolation” when you’re onstage performing. Even if the whole audience was composed solely of family members, you still need to present your “artist persona”, and not at-home-in-comfie-socks-Ritti.
I was even funny.
That was a bit of a surprise. I don’t really consider myself a funny person; I’m just someone who loves to laugh. I may be a performer, but I never saw myself as a crowd-entertainer. Mark is the funny one. He’s the clown Spontanello, the improvisation genius for family comedy. I, on the other hand, am the sombre, serious, “let’s-talk-about-depressions” performer for adults. I didn’t necessarily read light-hearted pieces; I just somehow had the audience in giggles with my anecdotes between poems.
Like in the following video. I like this version of performing my poem The Backpacker Poem (in English) very much, and because of the fun anecdote I tell (in German) in the end.
Apparently I read a hilariousextract from Qayqa. I honestly had no idea it was so funny: I read and suddenly everyone was in a fit of giggles. Well: performing is how we discover our own books. I obviously have to set that extract firmly into my performance repertoire!
I repeatedly thanked the audience for being so Generally Wonderful. I had such a damn good time with you folks. The murmurs of appreciation, sympathy or amusement are a fantastic interaction with the performer: what more could I possibly ask for, than an audience who dreams with me.
After most people had gone home, a small crowd remained behind to help Mark, Pixie and I clean up. Earlier on, we had had troubles with my guitar’s new strings, thus disabling me from performing a POEM + SONG that I had prepared. When Gerhard, the Angel, tuned the guitar, we all sat back down in the main room and I performed my POEM + SONG for the After-Show Party. Mark filmed it (the first half):
The feeling was so intense in the room, so supportive and beautiful, that when I was done, I looked into the crowd and said from the heart: “Can we not just stay here forever? I’ll keep performing if you want. Just let us stay here.”
♥ ♥ ♥
Performing POEMS + SONGS is something I plan to develop further. Any thoughts on this? Any advice? I thought of taking up the guitar beyond my 5 chords. Knowing how to play an instrument is so damn important.
Apart from the audience being absolutely brilliant that night, I have also (as you know) been thinking a lot about a Revolution of Fun. I have been getting so caught up in the structural side of my crowdfunding project, that having fun was the last thing on my mind. Try staying up until 6 or 7 am a few nights in a row, working only on preparing your art for performance, and fun will be the last thing on your mind … Unless you are as lucky as I was, and have an AMAZING crew who stay up with you / support & help you / make you coffee / make you laugh / believe in you / show you ways in which you can be the best version of your Self.
(l.t.r) Ritti Soncco, Fabiano “the Fab Fab” Nitsch, Richelle “Pixie” Signer, Mark “Robotermark” Klawikowski
Now that my beloved Pixie has hit the road again, it’s up to me to maintain the standard she brought back into my life: Good Food, Good Laughter, Family.
I started by relaxing during my afternoon interview at Radio Free FM with Paolo Percoco. He had heard our Platform Interview on Monday and asked me to come into his program “Ulmer Freiheit”. We met before the interview for the first time and immediately clicked. I had such a brilliant time On Air with him; I hope this is the first of many Percoco Meetings. Click Here to download the interview from the Radio Free FM website.
Since the CROWDFUNDING PROJECT started (CLICK HERE TO SUPPORT!), supporters have been writing to ask if there’s anything else they can do to support the Qayqa Crowdfunding. I’m amazed by this! Thank you!
I’m constantly brainstorming with the people in the picture above aso to what else we can do to get supporters for Qayqa. What are YOUR ideas???
What you can do for me is download the following StartNext Flyers and send them to all your friends. Tell them you saw me read; tell them how it was. Ask them to follow the StartNext Link (www.startnext.de/qayqa) and to trust you when you say they should really support the book.
You could also send them your favourite YouTube video to convince them:
On StartNext, the project is crawling. The Crowdfunding Parties raised approx. €200 which I’ll be submitting to StartNext next week, when I’m back in Ulm. We now have 25 days to raise approx. €2000. From the interest my audiences / crowdfunding-supporters are showing, I really, really believe this can work. We can really release QAYQA together.
During this Crowdfunding process, I can’t shake the persistent tick that there is so much more I should be doing. I get great suggests & ideas from friends & supporters, and I want to fulfill the ones I can.
Just a sidenote as to where I am right now: I’m at my Circus School preparing for our performance (PLEASE SEE CIRCUS VARIETÉ “KLASSENFOTO” on the NEXT PERFORMANCES section, on the right panel of this blog). I have a solo on the aerial silks, so every day, I get up at 7 am to train the hell out of my body all day. I’m pretty exhausted; I’m pretty damn happy.
This is where I am right now, where I receive aerial classes!
photograph by Fabiano Nitsch
Despite being at my circus school I’m taking every free minute to check my mails, reply, bug people on the internet, and follow up on your ideas.
Keep ’em coming! I will do all I can, because YOU truly have brilliant ideas.
I have a birthday coming up. Shall we meet then to do a guerilla reading? I could have a computer with internet access in the room so that you can SUPPORT while the reading is still hot in your memory, haha!
Last Friday, 24th May, I held my 1st Crowdfunding Party. All were invited to hear my reading of Qayqa and watch the premiere of my Crowdfunding Video. I am delighted to begin this blog post with these beautiful pictures… and many beautiful videos!
all photographs of the Crowdfunding Party courtesy of Ben Paul
Premiere being over, I would love to begin this blog post with the Crowdfunding Video, filmed to promote my upcoming novel Qayqa:
When I was writing the concept for my crowdfunding video, I began looking for something to make it a bit unique, give it an eye-catcher. I also knew I would be editing it myself, therefore looked for something to challenge me. I considered the things I find especially interesting in filmmaking.
Simple answer: split-screens!
Now there are several ideas behind the concept of the Two Rittis:
There are two Rittis: there is the bubbly, happy, easily excitable one, who will dance around while she tells you about her book. Then there is the quiet, sombre, observant Ritti, who, after giving a reading is more of a listener. She’s the one the audience come to, to talk about their impressions of & thought on the reading. She’ll listen quietly, actually shyly, take it all backstage with her and have a Long Hard Think. She’s a bit cheeky, but it’s all in her head
Being a very typical Gemini. Btw, Mark is also Gemini, and when we worked together, we used to sure: “We can easily do all this work. After all, there are four of us.”
Being an only child and always wishing for a sibling
There’s a painting I adore by my favourite painter, and this is a little hommage to it, and the things it stands for:
“The Two Fridas” by Frida Kahlo
Ofcourse the scenes of me on the black silks allude to what inspired the “flying people” of Qayqa: when I joined Circus Serrando, befriending aerialists and discovering a second home at the circus.
I want to thank Fabiano “the Fab Fab” Nitsch for filming this beautiful video with me; for his patience & kindness & red wine. The amazing thing about Fabiano is, no matter what you say to him, his reply will be: “We’ll get that done! No problem!”
It was a beautiful night at the Fort Unterer Kuhberg. We presented our video to the premiere crowd of the 24th May, right after I read Qayqa for the first time in a very long time… And this is what my reading looked like:
The place was beautifully decorated, lit up with candles. The guests mingled to Ray LaMontagne, looked at Mark’s beautiful illustrations, and at 9 pm, all moved to the main room, where I read a few poems and then read several sections from my upcoming novel Qayqa.
Thanks to the incredibly fabulous Fabiano Nitsch (therefore known on my blog as “the Fab Fab”), I can present you a beautiful short film from that night! The Fab spent the entire night crawling among the audience with 3 different cameras, filming everything he could, and then spent the following days editing this beautiful short video.
the Fab Fab at work
For those of you who couldn’t come in person… and for those who asked for a video (hello Hannah!), this is for you…
As I said, I read a few poems…
… Such as The Backpacker Poem. Of this, there is also a video, thanks to Fabiano:
Looking back, it was a beautiful night – but at the time, I was nervous. I hadn’t really slept. Pixie and I ran around all day organising last minute things, and I don’t know how prepared I really was. Personally, I wasn’t 100% satisfied with my performance.
I received very helpful feedback from friends, and have spent the last week thinking about what I should do differently. Change within myself, not the setting. The setting was beautiful; the decorations made it homey, romantic and dreamy. I loved it so much. There were blankets for cuddling, and there was an abundance of red wine, beer and pisco sour, which the audience enjoyed in elegant quantities.
Gerhard brought THE BIGGEST HUNK OF CHEESE in the world. It was bigger than my torso! Does anyone have a picture of it??? It was AMAZING. And it was a parmesan that I, being lactose-intolerant, could actually eat. Thank you Gerhard!
And yet I felt I wasn’t entirely focussed. There was a personal development that caught me off-balance, and as a performing artist knows: the show must go on! But I think I had a hard time really letting myself fall into my own words – and when that happens, I feel as though I were cheating my audience. Ofcourse, after reading Qayqa for the 100th time, you don’t feel the same excitement as at the first time, and what you might never guess is that while I read, I am actually very observant of my audience – and I have a thousand thoughts running through my head. All of this disabled me from really feeling what I read, and that isn’t a nice feeling when you’re performing…
Thankfully, the feedback from my audience was that all had a great time, enjoyed the reading – even enjoying my singing – and are now looking forward to supporting my crowdfunding project. THANK YOU!
it’s a good face
So there are some things I want to do differently for the 2nd Crowdfunding Reading on the 6th June. There was great feedback for the singing: I sang Somos, the Chavela Vargas way. This time, I want to have a greater variety of songs, each placed in a certain chapter. I have a little list…
Before I began reading, I told some stories about how Qayqa developed. This time, I’d like to get more into that. This time, I’ll say you’re welcome to ask questions. This time, Mark wants to give a little tour through his exhibition of illustrations.
Planning what I’d do differently is making me very excited for the 2nd Crowdfunding Party on the 2nd June! So if you’re reading this, and you came to the 1st, might I encourage you to come to the 2nd too? Each reading is a further stage of blossoming. Re-come, re-join, and re-party with us! There will be pisco sour, brought especially by my mother from Perú (she arrives tomorrow!).
your invitation to the 2nd Crowdfunding Reading!
After the Crowdfunding Party, I fell into an exhausted little hole. I spent the entire weekend in bed, barely moving a muscle. Pixie and I waved at each other from our beds, we watched films and spoke in mumbles. Then on Sunday, I somehow managed to sleep until 4 pm, I missed my shift at the Café Naschkatze, and subsequently got fired.
Damnit…!
A side of me was intensely shocked; I have never ever missed work like that before. I was ashamed that I had let my co-workers down, so I called everyone to apologise; apologised to the boss, and, in the end, left the café on very good terms. Sorry, people, no more cappuccini from me!
On the other hand, this is a – feeling cheeky as I say this – somewhat welcome step. I had announced at the café that I’d be leaving end of June, because (here it comes) I am giving up my apartment in the end of June. I’ll be travelling all of July & August. And why?
I announced it on Facebook last week:
this is why!
The cat’s out of the bag!
That’s why I flew to Aberdeen in May: I was visiting the University of Aberdeen, where I have been accepted to the Masters course of Anthropology with Hispanic Studies. … !
Aberdeen beach
Yes, I already applied, but I didn’t want to announce it until a) the university accepted me; b) I visited it to see if I liked it. And like it I did! Shortly beforehand, I got searched the university’s societies to see if there was a circus society, in touch with the Juggling Society, stayed on their sofa, got drunk with them, danced with them, and in the middle of the night, got out my computer and accepted the university’s offer!
impression of Aberdeen University
As of September 2013, I will be a student, and I am terribly excited about it. The decision to go to university has nothing to do with “giving up” my life as an artist. I could never do that. I was born to do this, and although it is certainly challenging sometimes, it is what I love.
The decision to go to university came out of the desire to learn more. I have been passionately reading essays and biographies on anthropology and ethnobotany for a few years now. Their influence can certainly be felt in my writing. By going to university, I am filling up my glass again, for I am deeply thirsty for more knowledge. I am also hoping to acquire additional means of financial income, and, ofcourse, added freedom to travel, investigate, learn and write down. Going to university is a step I need to take as a woman, and as a writer. While studying anthropology, I hope to specialise in Latin American and Caribbean studies, so that I may travel there more often – dive deeper into their magic realism, and swim to shore with more ideas for more books.
courtesy of Chris Marshall
What will happen to the blog?
It will continue, ofcourse! I’m not going to stop writing. In the future, I will continue to dedicate my blog to my artistic endeavors, perhaps occasionally mentioning which part of my studies are influencing my writing. We’ll see what happens. But this I promise you, ayllu: as long as I continue breathing, I will continue writing.
Seeing as my book planning has been pushed back a few months, it also looks like I’ll be book-touring in spring / summer 2014. So don’t worry, my dearest ayllu: our adventure together is far from over… This I promise you.
Therefore losing the job at the café, while sad, and giving me some financial instability this month, is … well … actually alright. So thank you Naschkatze for all the wonderful mornings and afternoons! It was beautiful while it lasted. I’ll come again – as a guest.
After I lost my job, I realised I could now concentrate fully on Qayqa! So I hit the StartNext website to promote it, because you need 25 fans for the project to be official. Over the space of 3 hours I bugged everyone on Facebook and we quickly made over 25 fans!
O how I celebrated.
Seeing as my best lamp is still at the Crowdfunding Party, we moved the celebration to the bathroom. You can just about see my shower in the background.
I had to stand on the toilet to do this, and yes, I was really shouting and celebrating. I was in an exceptional mood. While I was shouting, my lovely Pixie started quietly filming me – and this is the video that she made:
Now, I’m just waiting for the final verifications on the StartNext website, so that we can officially begin supporting Qayqa. This is where you’ll find her: http://www.startnext.de/qayqa
Hopefully the page will be up and running by tomorrow. I’ve sent off an email asking for the final verification, because, truth be told, you have to give these StartNext people a lot of things, including scanned copies of your passport, and then they need a few days to verify that you really are who you say you are. That’s why all this has taken a bit of time to get online… But hopefully, hopefully… tomorrow…
Now, HERE IS WHERE I NEED YOUR HELP:
For my upcoming book-tour, I want to come to YOU. I want to come to the cities YOU tell me to. If you know a good café, a friendly pub, a lovely library … or if you’d like to open up your living room & invite all of your friends: WRITE ME.
I have a team. I’ve never had this before, so these times are truly amazing. I actually have a PR Woman! She wants to remain anonymous (but she won’t manage for long) so for my love of nicknames I have called my PR lady: POWER RANGER. This is her Facebook page.
So if you know of a lovely place where you think I should perform Qayqa… Or you think I should read in your living room…
Please write: pr.rittisoncco@gmail.com
Power Ranger might just be at the 2nd Crowdfunding Party on the 6th June… So if you can make it, tell all your friends to make it too, and join us! You saw the pictures! I promise you it will be beautiful. You can ask all your questions, we’ll drink pisco sour together, and I will sing in tune, I promise.
And now, for one last Other Something…
a mysterious occurrence in the kitchen, caused by a pixie
Shortly before my first Crowdfunding Party on the 24th May, a young backpacker lady called Richelle moved in with me, into my 1-bedroom apartment. I nicknamed her “Pixie”, because ever since I first met her in Cusco, Perú, she had a pixie nature.
There’s a lot I can say about pixie natures, but there’s one important thing I really want to say. Her stay with me was MEDICINE.
If you want to know what I mean, THIS is MEDICINE:
Spend a winter alone, bordering on depression, not getting any work done and wondering what the whole point of it is. Along comes a pixie, and I’m laughing all day
Not eating very well, because you’re (see above). Along comes a pixie, who not only insists on cooking, but also cooks only the healthiest of things for you, and suddenly eating is a celebration again
Demanding silence, only to realise that I had 5 months of silence and laughing with her is that much better
Discovering a lot of things about yourself; things you can only discover when someone close to you holds up a mirror
She was an amazing help for my Crowdfunding Party. Not only did she cut all of the flyers (because I can’t cut a straight line to save my life. I’m amazed they let me out of kindergarten)… she also helped set up the entire party… stayed up working with me until 4 am… Drank too much coffee and threatened me with a sock… Helped me think my organising through, and then helped me organise…
Above all: she made me laugh.
There’s a problem when you make a living doing something you love. Maybe this is something other freelancers will nod at; maybe this is just me: You forget to laugh.
You get so caught up in all the organising, all the structure, all the pulling of all strings – that when someone asks me a simple question while I’m mid-thought, I give a curt & unpleasant response. Richelle, however, reminded me to laugh. Those of you who met her at the Crowdfunding Party will know she’s a hilarious young lady. Just by being how she is, she reminded me to stop worrying; stop biting too hard onto problems; to step back and think about her questions, answer things calmly, instead of being annoyed at being disturbed mid-thought again.
Do this – and you’ll laugh a lot more.
Because – seriously – WHY are we doing this, if we’re not having fun doing it??? Why all the work, all the phone calls, all the press-contacting, all the people-emailing, all the Making of Lists – IF WE’RE NOT HAVING A LAUGH???
After a long grey winter of staring at the wall, Richelle made me laugh & enjoy my work again. She came into my life, turned all the paintings in my apartment upside down, fattened me up … and now she’s saying her farewells. Is the road calling? She came at the right time. Wherever she goes, I’m sure she’ll arrive there at the right time too. I hope she’ll be back. She was an epic companion, and a friend when I most needed one.
So much happening, dear ayllu. I hope to see you at the 2nd Crowdfunding Party on the 6th June! Come meet us all in person (Ritti, Mark, the Fab Fab, Pixie, Power Ranger), celebrate with us, and let me whisk you away when I read…
and again
I want to leave you with this beautiful song, sent to me by the Pixie while she was in Malaysia. I got it at a time when life was still pretty hard, and I must have listened to it 10 times over. Now I want to pass it on.
Thank you, ayllu, for cheering me up – for supporting Qayqa – for listening. Have a wonderful night. See you on the 6th June.
It’s 1:39 am. Pixie and I are still awake and working hard, preparing the last bits and pieces for my Crowdfunding Party tomorrow. We’re both very excited and that’s the adrenaline we’re running on.
What made it all very real was receiving an email this morning from a trapeze student’s parent, telling me she had read all about my crowdfunding party in the newspaper. Blurry-eyed I did the mad scramble to the computer, googled myself and, yeah, it’s bizarre to do that and actually find yourself. We rushed for coffee at the supermarket and bought the newspaper because the printed word is still more powerful than the digital word. I stood with the newspaper in my hand, staring and feeling very proud.
This is it. Qayqa is coming out. So many times, she was spoken of, she was present; but she was always in the background. Now she’s coming out, and we’re doing all we can to ensure a beautiful birth.
I spent the day on several computers: making more Crowdfunding flyers for the next reading on the 6th June… editing my rewards… typing up my project description on StartNext (the crowdfunding platform I chose)… and putting English subtitles on my crowdfunding video. As of this evening, my crowdfunding video is officially DONE.
In the later evening we met up with Mark to set everything up for tomorrow. I love doing this a day before because it gives you that extra day to sort out everything you’d forgotten about. Artists don’t always have the luxury of setting up a day before, so this is a big deal.
Now I know getting to the Party location is a bit tricky. A lot of people like to wander about and get lost. So I made a series of photographs just for you, ensuring you’ll find it.
For the lucky ones with a car navigation system OR fancy smartphones with GoogleMaps, the address you’ll want to type in is: Unterer Kuhberg 16, 89077 Ulm
For those who like to understand the Bigger Picture (where I am in relation to Sweden):
For those who understand best when they’ve seen it before already:
this is what the road on the Kuhberg towards the Walddorfschulen & ADK looks like. Car positioning is subject to change.
This is the entrance to the ADK Acting School, but you drive past it…
You drive on past the trash bottle containers and around the stone corner you see in the background
… Where you will see this black doorway. You can either park here or through the next corner, but you’ll want to get past this black doorway and into the yard beyond it
Once in the yard, you’ll see several doors waiting for you. You want the SECOND door, which looks like this! See the yellow Serrando sign in the top left corner?
Inside, you’ll walk up 2 flights of stairs until you reach the open door welcoming you to the QAYQA Crowdfunding Party!
We prepared the scene for you this evening. This is a little of what awaits you, except when you’ll be there, it will be lit with candles (arranged beautifully by Richelle):
Mark praising the bar, Pixie is small because she’s making candlelight arrangements
a part of Mark’s exhibition
FYI: Even if you come tomorrow, it’s worth coming to the 2nd Crowdfunding Reading on the 6th June because Mark has a few illustrations too “in-process” to exhibit, which he will exhibit on the 6th. So you might as well come then too!
The pictures don’t do the atmosphere justice. It feels beautiful in there. Pure circus. As you can see, we have a little bar going, and we’ll have snacks. I completely forgot to buy water or juice; I just bought wine & beer. Pixie will hit the shops tomorrow for those who’re driving and will be drinking juice. Also: you may have spotted the eggs. That’s because we’re making pisco sour tomorrow, a Peruvian cocktail! I already packed my blender into my handbag. (It actually fits in there.)
In front of my stage is a large space for people to sit on the comfy mat, or lie down. We’ve placed blankets left and right so you can cuddle yourself up. I do encourage you to sit wherever you feel most comfortable, and if it’s on the floor: snuggle up and get cosy.
Please help yourself to the bar. I don’t know if Mark or Pixie will have time to serve you. In fact, she’s making signs saying DRINK ME, EAT ME (what book is that from?) to encourage you to serve yourself. Don’t be shy. We’re all at home here. Pass the wine bottle around, think of the Beat Generation and relax. This space is yours for the dreaming.
There will be a small donation box (which Richelle is making as I write this) where you can lose your change.
working on making a pretty donation box
THIS MONEY WILL GO STRAIGHT TO MY CROWDFUNDING PROJECT.
We’ve also set up a small “merchandise” table where you can shop my first book Overripe Fruits or postcards.
It has been an interesting few days. It’s still exciting to be sharing my small space with someone else; someone who is so annoyingly good at noticing when I am procrastinating on Facebook. She chose the best time to leave Australia and come to Ulm. She’s been my Qayqa Gang and I am immensely grateful for the help & the laughs.
Other than that, how do I feel? A bit stressed out because I have a list of things to prepare for tomorrow and I feel like I’m running out of time. But I always feel like that. I’m just getting really excited to step on that stage and read / sing / perform things for you. The Fab Fab will filming so we can share this (hopefully magical) night with those of you who are with us in spirit but not in body.
Tomorrow night, I’ll be reading a few extracts from Qayqa. Never-read-before extracts too. I’ll be singing a bit. I’ll perform some poetry. Then I’ll show you my crowdfunding video, explain the concept, tell you all about the exciting rewards, and we’ll have drinks. I’ll answer all your questions, celebrate with you, and if you liked what you heard, take a few flyers home and give it to all your friends. Tell them about my project; tell them what you thought about Qayqa. Tell them about my blog and get them to come on the 6th June.
I look forward to talking to you all personally tomorrow. If you want, I’ll share some stories from backpacking around Latin America. This is, after all, the first time some of us will see each other again since my return. There are a lot of stories you haven’t heard. I’m happy to share.
Well, ayllu, I look forward to seeing you tomorrow!
this is an updated version of the post. What’s new are more photographs of more sunrises.
Dear ayllu, you are invited!
With the crowdfunding video inches away from being done, the illustrations almost done, and the German version of Qayqa in its final stages … it’s time to start reading and performing.
I decided to start giving a series of Crowdfunding Parties when a reader posted that she would love a reading-party as a reward for supporting the book. I loved the idea because in my mind, that hails back to the Beats in San Francisco, reading their poetry to one another in smoky rooms, getting drunk & getting high, celebrating all the pains and joys life will give you, through literature.
Also, a crowdfunding party is a fun way to get some attention on Qayqa and her upcoming crowdfunding project.
So I made the above flyer and am now handing it out everywhere & to everyone.
You’ll notice that there are two dates on it. This is because of the Pentecost holiday. I have a problem with Pentecost. It always gets in the way of my plans. I always forget it, plan events, and then everyone is away on holiday. So I made a SECOND crowdfunding party after the holidays, so that everyone who is away can come.
This is the back of the flyer:
What I’m planning for the party is this: I’ll be reading from 2-3 different chapters of Qayqa, to give you a better overview of how diverse her narrative is. I’ll talk about the concept of crowdfunding, because I know that it is still a relatively new & abstract concept to many people. We’ll premiere my crowdfunding video. Mark will exhibit the illustrations, which is what I am most excited about. We might show one or two other films we directed / acted in / produced… It’ll be like walking into our art portfolio.
This evening will also mark the beginning of Qayqa‘s crowdfunding project. After the performance, I’ll go to the next wifi hotspot and submit Qayqa to the crowdfunding world. And you’ll be there at the start.
After this evening, I AM GOING TO NEED YOUR HELP. Tell your friends. Tell your families. Tell your neighbors. Tell your lovers. Tell everyone. Get them to look at the project online and get them to support!
On the 6th June, I’ll host the second party to get attention back on Qayqa. I’ll read again. We’ll exhibit again. We’ll have fun.
I have a dream for these reading parties. I want lots of pillows on the floor, people relaxing on them, passing wine bottles around, closing their eyes, relaxing & listening. I dream of something like the Beats had in the 60s.
Let me whisk you off to a different world… Let me sing for you, read for you. All you have to do is come round, lean back, and pass a wine bottle around.
You might have noticed the “new” NEXT PERFORMANCES section on the right side of the blog. I’m finally filling it up, including a performance in September, for Ulm’s Kulturnacht 2013. I’m so excited to be a part of that again! So please watch that column a lot in the upcoming weeks, because it will be filling up quite a lot!
One exciting upcoming performance is my circus apprenticeship graduation. After a year and a half of attending the Jojo Circus School, learning different circus disciplines, our graduation constitues of performing two nights in a circus tent at the Rappenhof! I’ll be performing on the silks and figuration (I posted a video of figuration here), but we’ll also have excellent juggling, trapeze, clowns, and much much more!
As I was a media designer for picture & sound in a previous life, I was commissioned by my class to create our flyers. This is the front:
And back:
I wrote this last time, but if you’re interested in coming to this event, I’m happy to repeat the details:
Tickets cost € 10 for adults; € 5 for children
Overnight Opportunity: You can choose to spend the night in a 2-bedroom (adults: € 15 / children: € 12) OR in the Big Top Tent (adults: € 5 / children: € 4) OR in a circus caravan with shower & electricity (adults: € 8 / children: € 4).
Food: Breakfast is € 5, lunch is € 8, dinner is € 6. On Saturday, there will be a buffet for € 12, where you’ll wine & dine with us and party afterwards but! the buffet doesn’t open until approx. 10:30 pm, so bring a snack. Breakfast on Sunday is € 5.
DVD: You can order a DVD of our performance for € 10.
If you know already that you want to come, then SEND ME AN EMAIL (rittisoncco@gmail.com) and I’ll book your room / caravan / tent space for you. Be sure to tell me in your email if you want food, the DVD, and how many tickets I should reserve for you.
_________________________________
On another matter entirely: I have recently become the happy host of a pixie!
Pixie Richelle
In previous posts, I occasionally mentioned a pixie. Well, her name is Richelle and I met her while I was volunteering at Helping Hands Cusco, Perú. She contributed amazingly to the Backpacker Poem and Iquitos was the last place I saw her. Since then, she travelled around the States, made wine in Australia and couchsurfed in Malaysia. Last week, she landed in Germany just in time for our circus performance of Miro & Mira and she’s been here ever since.
No one knows when she’s leaving.
I told her can stay as long as she likes.
We’re sharing my one-bedroom apartment. And it’s working.
“Life is so heavy… I just need to… lie down… for a little bit…”
It took a while to synchronise though. Between her jetlag and general madness, when I was falling asleep, she was waking up:
4 am
When she was falling asleep, I was hyper and bouncing off the walls. This hyperactivity was the reason I was able to take several pictures of several sunrises:
my angel’s trumpet, who watched the sun rise with me
Pixie is an incredible cook. She’s incredibly brilliant company. She is being supportive of my work, kicking me to make lists of the Things I Need To Do, making me tea while I blog, and generally helping me figure my work out. She has cheeky, crazy conversations with herself.
I’ll go as far as to say that she is the best thing that could have happened to me right now. After an astonishingly grey winter, she’s bringing life back into my apartment, reviving the spirit of living slowly, and making me eat healthy again. I’ve said this to her a few times, but I want to say it here again: Thanks for coming here, pixie. I love having you here.
If she becomes a musician, this should be the album cover
having a delicious evening wine by the Danube
Pixie with the Fab Fab
You’ll meet her at the crowdfunding party. She doesn’t speak German but her smile will charm your pants off.
It’s great to have such a colourful character accompanying my life. Who knows how long she’ll hang around Europe, but if she’s here by the time I blog next, you’ll hear all about our adventures.
AND ONE LAST THING. This is my first blog post from my new computer. I can’t believe this. A few weeks ago, I tweeted that my sweet little backpack netbook is dying and if anyone knows of any second hand Macbooks flying around.
As of yesterday, I am the incredibly proud, baffled, breathtaken owner of a beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful Macbook Air.
The story of this Macbook Air is so epic, I’m only telling it in person. Thank you Gerhard, for being the best & most baffling reader a writer could hope for. My promise to you: I will use this elegant new computer to write more & more often, dedicate it completely to the arts, so that you can rest assured knowing that it is always in good use.
Thank You SO Much.
P.S.: I have thought about this for a while, and in my mind, the theory has confirmed itself repeatedly: it is our audiences who teach us that we are artists. By attending, applauding and appreciating, you teach us the worth of our work. You show us that the dream that led us to go against everything stable, everything economically viable, everything our parents warned us against, was actually worthwhile. You teach me to write more, to believe that what I say is worth thinking about, and to keep at it. No matter how restless I get. No matter how lonely I get. No matter how frustrating, hungry, furious, desperate I get. The audience teaches the artists that they are artists.
I really believe that.
Now I have to go, because Pixie has made soup and it smells delicious…
My name is Ritti Soncco. Born in Peru, bred in Nigeria and Germany, currently living in Scotland. I am a writer, aerialist and medical anthropologist. This blog is all about finding a balance between the artistic and the academic.
AYLLU (Quechua): spiritual family; a nickname I use for my blog-reading family.
AYNI (Quechua): reciprocity; the fundamental law of Andean society. The concept of ayni goes as follows: if two people race against each other, the winner of the race is then, by the law of ayni, obliged to teach and train the loser how s/he won, until they become equally good. According to the law of ayni, this is the only way in which a society can advance.
Two travelers climbed out of the entanglements of the woods and found themselves among the soft French murmurs of the ocean city Montpellier. His hair fell in masses that mimicked the leaves in autumn and smelt of bonfires over which he had cooked dinners and boiled coffee. Her scalp was covered in sand, le sable, and her hair clumped into what would, with time, become dreadlocks formed by swimming in the Mediterranean Sea and in lakes.
A Journal on Being a Writer 